All posts tagged: Love

In This Space … 

Decided in an effort to write slightly longer posts and embrace vulnerability, I should share a few “journal” type entries. Not sure whether or not to include full dates, or just day and month, so I’ll play around with it and see how I feel.  31st August;  It’s 10PM and I’m sitting here,asking myself if it really is easier to cling onto these memories, but also wondering why I cling onto them so tight to begin with?   My only conclusion is that I’m worried about what’s outside of this space.  Despite my heart breaking a little more each day, somehow I still want to stay here. Its painful but it doesn’t yet feel like it’ll be any better out there.  In here it’s dark and I feel sick and scared of what will be revealed to me next.  I have to cry myself to sleep, or speak to anyone who’ll listen and then and only then is it over and I can again see a future.  Suddenly I start reflecting on the never ending …

Life + Blog Update With A Side Of .. Hope?

Since briefly mentioning my break up last week (here) I’ve been trying to re-organise myself, whilst attempting to do the same with my blog as my writing has fallen way behind. Something which I never saw coming, I thought I wouldn’t be able to shut up and have about 20 posts up already but, nope.  That was until last night. The combination of no sleep, having no contact with Mr C and a weekend fuelled by things people do at weekends, I ended up writing Mr Cheerful a bit of a book. This morning, I briefly went over what I had written and the parts I looked at seem so tangled in sadness, shock and confusion.  Emotions of going through a break up? But for some reason I feel the same way I did when my Grandfather died. Which is that I have no right to feel this way. I shouldn’t be sad anymore. I should already have moved on from this.  I should already be .. happier. Think these thoughts may also be down …

Reflection: August

One word to describe August is bittersweet. Do wish I could leave it there, but as per my bio, I want to share the good and bad with you… as much as I possibly can. I’ll start off with the “bitter” part, so that I can end on a sweeter note. Firstly myself and Mr Cheerful have broken up. There were many reasons, most too personal to share and I’m not too good at doing personal when it comes to relationships. Either way, the end result is we are no longer together. My go to response when friends and family ask me about it, is “ask me in a month”. Because in this moment, there are no real words, just facial expressions, coupled with awkward silences and usually followed up by a failed attempt at a smile. That’s all I have to say about it, for now. Making its way onto this list is money. Financially this month hasn’t been great,  I could’ve managed my money a lot better. SO in a bid to improve …

Three Things Thursday

Hello! Hi three things readers, the absence of gratitude is not for the lack of good things happening, I just haven’t mastered the art of coping with some of the trials that have presented themselves this past month.   But today has been a good day so here’s my gratitude list, not just for the week but with highlights from this month.  Kindness. Doesn’t cost a damn thing, so why can’t more people spread it around as much as they do hate? I’ll never know. But I wanted to THANK every single stranger that helped me, during my long journey from Japan to London, via Amsterdam.  It was the best way to welcome me back to Europe. Despite being exhausted, emotional and anxious throughout, each person that offered to help with my luggage and ginormous dog (travel) crate on trains, buses and ferry made the journey so much easier.  I wish I could contact you all and let you know just what it meant to me. And hope that the universe rewards you with nothing …

Contemplation,Week 14

Hello! Welcome to week 14 of Contemplation, where Desley from musings of a frequent flying scientist, chooses a prompt from her Kikki.K  A Sentence a Day Journal and invites us to share our response. * my post from Week 13, here * Today’s prompt: What challenge did you overcome today? One of today’s challenges was not letting doubt and anxiety of making it work take over. Myself and Mr Cheerful are currently in a long distance relationship, it’s the first time for us both. And at the moment we’re still in the teething stages of it all, the one where we try to get into a routine and battle out the big struggle that is time difference. He is eight hours ahead of me, when he sleeps I’m at work, and his at work whilst I sleep. Admittedly I am having a harder time with it than I expected. Maybe it’s due to the lack of sleep (my dog isn’t used to city noise yet and barks through the night) or maybe I am understandably sad that Mr …

Weekly Photo Challenge #26: Partners Who

… Play Together, Stay Together. After a few weeks off, I’m back for some photo challenge fun with today’s response to the theme Partners. Photo of my kittens who are definitely partners in crime, and do everything together. It’s the sweetest thing to witness! They are currently in the care of Mr Cheerful (in Japan) as I’m now back in London. Read more about that and how they came into our lives, here. Have a great weekend ahead. ** Schedule for posts have changed as I’m no longer in Japan, so currently playing around with times to see what works best.

Life Update (With A Side of Jet Lag)

Hello! Hello! Today I wanted to share what’s kept me away from here, beginning with the news that I am no longer in Japan and finally back home in London. HURRAH but first lets go back to my last days in Japan and the ridiculousness that took place. Forgive my ramblings I wrote this SUPER jet lagged. Goodbye (for now) My Loves … During my last week and a half I became part owner of these two. How did this happen? I went to get my dog his vet certificate for travel and bumped into a distressed lady and three kittens in a box, by the way this is the second time I have met a lady with a box of stray kittens at the vets. She stroke up a conversation with me as the only other English speaker and we bonded over animals.I found out later that she was a flight attendant and due to leave that very same day, so she desperately wanted someone i.e the vets to look after them. After a …